Corrupt a Wish!

 
    • V1nc3ntK sa...
    • Användare
    • 9 mar 2011, 20:01
    Granted. But with zero cognitive ability your knowledge is meaningless.

    I wish I could go back and give my 18-year old self a bit of advice.

    The Ancient DisOrder of the Last FM Round Table
  • Granted, but the resulting paradox negates all existence. Again. (Will you stop doing that)

    I wish my desk would tidy itself.

    There are things known and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors of perception.
    Aldous Huxley

    Skateboarding Ruined My Life.
    Thankfully.

    Never Argue With Idiots. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.
    • Kennoth sa...
    • Användare
    • 9 mar 2011, 23:02
    Granted. It starts by always devouring everything put on it, and if there's no solid object to consume, it will eventually start consuming itself until it creates a black hole and implodes everything within 3000km vicinity. Unfortunately, that blast would destabilize the Earth's rotation, and it would quite literally start sucking itself into the black hole until its all that remains.

    I wish I had a supercomputer.

    What breaks my pride, will break your skull. I bring the end, just like an Archangel.

    • taelerrr sa...
    • Användare
    • 10 mar 2011, 03:44
    Granted. Supercomputer takes over the world. It now officially being the new god, enslaves the human race and you are the first sacrifice.

    I wish I had a time machine

  • Granted. No instructions. :(

    I wish this headache would go away.

  • [spam]

    [spam]

    Redigerad av hjbardenhagen den 5 sep 2011, 12:18
    • taelerrr sa...
    • Användare
    • 10 mar 2011, 07:20
    Granted. You're "Sandwiched" in between two turkeys.

    I wish for nothing.

  • Granted. You live every day miserably and eventually kill yourself because of the wish that got away.

    I wish for love <3!

  • [spam]

    [spam]

    Redigerad av hjbardenhagen den 5 sep 2011, 12:18
    • taelerrr sa...
    • Användare
    • 10 mar 2011, 08:48
    Granted. You won't be presented it until you're on your deathbed when the person gets to you,you'll be already dead for 2 hours.

    I wish to be stranded on an island

    • Kennoth sa...
    • Användare
    • 10 mar 2011, 09:59
    Granted. You're stuck on a remote pacific never-before-discovered island inhabited with wild tribes that practice cannibalism, especially so on foreigners.

    I wish I don't have to study today.

    What breaks my pride, will break your skull. I bring the end, just like an Archangel.

    • taelerrr sa...
    • Användare
    • 10 mar 2011, 10:33
    Granted. You fail everything, even life.

    I wish I were immortal

  • Granted but after The Large Hadron Collider disaster of tomorrow you spend eternity floating around in nothingness.


    I wish I was

  • Granted, but now you are no more.

    I wish I had an Adamantium skeleton and the strength of Superman.

  • Granted, but since you are a scientific curiosity, the goverment comes after you and locks you away for years of horrible experiments.

    I wish I could go back to the time when I was younger and severly injure myself for being a spineless retard.

    ǝɔuǝʇuǝs spɹɐʍʞɔɐq
    • [Raderad användare] sa...
    • Användare
    • 11 mar 2011, 11:11
    Granted, but actually you injured your past self so badly that you unable to go back in time to hurt yourself in the first place trapping you in an impossible static state between pain and comfort.

    I just wish mom and dad wouldn't fight anymore!

    • V1nc3ntK sa...
    • Användare
    • 11 mar 2011, 11:15
    Granted, they make peace and sweet sweet love, unfortunately, right in front of you. And everyone else in Tesco.

    I wish spring would hurry up.

    The Ancient DisOrder of the Last FM Round Table
  • Granted. In doing so, time begins to gradually speed up, month by month - until everyone and everything is aging at an extremely accelerated rate - leaving the entire earth a pile of ash inside of 2 years.

    I wish I could go on a world tour.

    • V1nc3ntK sa...
    • Användare
    • 11 mar 2011, 14:49
    Granted. You carry with you a virulent and unique disease that wipes out all life as you pass, such that when return to you start point all you find before you is a grey sludge, and when you look back that same grey sludge is approaching in a vast tsuanmi that spreads along the entire horizon as the starts go out one by one.

    I wish I could buy bagels in Brussels.

    The Ancient DisOrder of the Last FM Round Table
    • lawynd sa...
    • Abonnent
    • 11 mar 2011, 17:27
    Granted - the Belgians dedicate themselves so completely to their love of baked circles of dough that they stop making chocolate, waffles and beer altogether.


    I wish my housemates would clean up after themselves.

    Official recorder of Schrödinger's Tampon.

    Quote of the moment - "They tried to get me to eat haggis but I couldn't stomach it."
  • They do, but now they're overly anal about cleanliness and every time you don't wash a dish within 30 seconds of using it they crowd around you shouting "unclean!"

    They also wrap all the furniture in a protective layer of plastic. Including your bed.

    I wish I had the power to stop time.

    Are you writing from the heart?
  • Granted. At first you find your new world amusing, but soon you'll realize that you never wished to have the power to restart time, and now your stuck in a never-ending limbo.

    I wish I could get perfect graphite electrodes.

    ǝɔuǝʇuǝs spɹɐʍʞɔɐq
  • Granted -but as they are so perfect, a jealous person will notice not long after you've had them and steal them from you at a time when you least expect it.

    I wish he was mine.

    ⊙__⊙
    • Kennoth sa...
    • Användare
    • 11 mar 2011, 23:49
    Granted. *poof* and he turns into a lifeless inanimate miles long and several miles deep copper mine.

    I wish she was mine.

    What breaks my pride, will break your skull. I bring the end, just like an Archangel.

  • Granted. *Phunmph – She turns into a protracted and highly misogynistic mine-based pun involving 'long' and 'deep' euphemisms. The words 'strip' and 'penetration' are also used. Everyone is deeply embarrassed and shuffles away, muttering awkwardly. You never quite get over the feeling that you hadn't quite thought that one through.

    I wish I hadn't just run out of milk.

    There are things known and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors of perception.
    Aldous Huxley

    Skateboarding Ruined My Life.
    Thankfully.

    Never Argue With Idiots. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.
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